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You are watching: History of asking father for permission to marry daughter


Back in the day, the wasn't a question as to whether or not a male would propose-it to be a concern of when he would perform it. Times were various than they are today. Young women lived with their parents until they married, and also that was standard from the start of time until about 50 years ago. Now, if they deserve to afford it, many women get their very own apartments when they graduate indigenous school, whether it's high college or college. Castle have financial institution accounts, jobs, and also independence. Also if they move out a little bit later, many modern couples finish up living together before marriage. Which renders the entirety "ask for permission" thing seem equal components old-fashioned and also silly.

But then there's the issue of tradition, and also no occasion honors and also nurtures tradition much more than a wedding. There's the walking down the aisle, the ns dos, the first dance, the toasts, and countless various other rituals the make a wedding a time-honored experience. Before any type of of those things can happen, though, there's acquired to be a decision to marry, and also for countless couples, the very first question inquiry isn't, "Will you marry me?" yet "May i marry her daughter?"

Asking her dad for his permission is meant to show respect but it's currently perceived by part as sexist. Why questioning the bride's dad or both parents because that permission? She isn't residential property that's expected to it is in traded, as females were in the past. And also how come the bride doesn't have actually a comparable question because that the groom's parents? when it would certainly be hard to think anyone affiliated in this Q&A bring away it together a serious request, it's something to think about. In no means should a guy talk about marrying his girlfriend v her parents before he's discussed it through her first. Huge life decisions need to be talked about thoroughly and also repeatedly before anyone hops a plane to the bride's parents' hometown or a ring is bought.

Like plenty of things regarded weddings, asking her parents for your permission is a long-held tradition, yet it might not be best for everyone. As long as the bride and also groom discuss whether or not to execute it beforehand, they're good to go. If you think she dad would certainly appreciate the gesture, then carry out it as a formality. If you know your girlfriend would certainly hate the idea, skip it. And if the idea of asking for "permission" at every feels choose too much to sloop down (you space both adults, ~ all), then try asking for your blessing instead. That way, you're making it clear that you intend to propose, yet that it would mean a an excellent deal to you to have actually their support first.



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This Is Why men Traditionally Asked she Parents for Permission to Propose—Is the factor Still valid Today?